


Swell

by Hormonal_Trashbag



Series: Reylo Fanfiction Tropes [6]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alpha Kylo Ren, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternating Timeline, F/M, Knotting, Omega Rey, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pregnancy, Rimming, Trying For A Baby, and then some more angst, angst angst angst, kylo is a virgin
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-08
Updated: 2018-07-04
Packaged: 2019-02-12 06:38:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12953484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hormonal_Trashbag/pseuds/Hormonal_Trashbag
Summary: She knew that some omegas ignored the archaicpullto be mated. There was some debate over how voluntary an omega’s participation in mating could be, though she knew many of those that argued against it were betas that had never experienced a heat to begin with. What could they possibly know?There was always a choice.Rey couldn’t help being practical about it. If she ignored her biological call, she would spend a long week throbbing, writhing with a need to be filled. She’d have to skip work for a few days at the very least.It was just...easierto give in.





	1. back: i

**Author's Note:**

> HEED THE NOTES, PLEASE. There is rimming in this fic and I don't want anyone to be taken by surprise. If that isn't something you're into, don't read.
> 
> ANYWAY, I'M BACK! It's been a hellish semester but my unexpected hiatus is officially over! I will also be returning to tumblr today. I plan to continue my ongoing fics but in the meantime, enjoy this garbage. <3

It started, as it always did, with a slight buzz of heat low in her belly.

Rey shifted on her feet, fingers clenching around the warmed metal of a bus bar handle. By the time she finished her commute to the downtown public library, the usual emotional neediness would be bursting from her chest. When she closed the library at five, it would be difficult to hide her state but not impossible. She was fortunate to be dressed in a pair of black jeans today: the dark material would disguise the inevitable slick that would spill down her thighs.

Maybe her good luck would prevail and the nearby alpha––whoever he was--would hunt her down before her heat became unbearable. If he stayed nearby, he would certainly be able to smell the thick, cloying sweetness of her arousal permeating the air around her.

She knew that some omegas ignored the archaic _pull_ to be mated. There was some debate over how voluntary an omega’s participation in mating could be, though she knew many of those that argued against it were betas that had never experienced a heat to begin with. What could they possibly know?

There was always a choice.

Rey couldn’t help being practical about it. If she ignored her biological call, she would spend a long week throbbing, writhing with a need to be filled. She’d have to skip work for a few days at the very least.

It was just... _easier_ to give in.

Occasionally, it was even nice. Mutually beneficial. The alpha in question got something wet and hot and tight to bury their prick in and she got to come, sometimes more than once.

Unconsciously, she rubbed her thighs together. The bus was packed with people, all stinking with sweat and wet dog from the rain. Under it all, though, was a sharp spiciness that put her on edge. She took a deep drag of air into her lungs, tasting his pheromones at the back of her throat like a hot brand.

If the bus hadn’t been so crammed with passengers, she probably would have been able to pick him out, but Rey was surrounded by a wall of standing people and had no mobility to search for him.

At her stop, she had no choice but to stumble down the steps of the bus and onto the sidewalk. The rain had abated slightly, and she took a moment to open her umbrella, eyes darting through the wide windows to spot the most likely candidate, looming towards the rear of the bus.

He was uncomfortably tall and broad, hunching in on himself in a pointless attempt to make himself smaller. In a flash, wide, brown eyes met hers, a pair of plump lips parting in surprise. A jolt of desire went straight to her clitoris and Rey squirmed under his stunned stare, her heart bursting in her ears.

 _Oh,_ she thought, the bus jerking into motion and pulling the alpha out of sight. _That was different._

If he was smart, he’d hop on the next bus back.

 

* * *

 

By the time he exhaled, his lungs were on fire.

Ben shuddered, for a moment unsteady on his feet. He’d heard all the warnings before but nothing had prepared him for the overwhelming scent of an omega. From the moment she had stepped onto the bus to when she scurried off again, he had held his breath, knuckles turning white from how tight his fists were. It had taken a ridiculous amount of restraint to not push his way through the crowded transport to find her, even more so to resist the urge to leap from the bus at the stop after hers and sprint all the way back to where she’d gotten off.

He really hoped the little old lady perched on the seat in front of where he stood hadn’t noticed the subtle way he’d shifted his backpack to hide his sudden hard-on.

Ben had no idea why he’d thought he could control this. It was obvious to him now that he couldn’t.

The look she had given him...it would haunt Ben. Somehow, she had gazed up at him and _known_ he was an alpha, in the same way he’d known she was an omega.

His blood was boiling, the faux leather of his backpack strap squeaking in the clench of his fingers. He had to calm himself. He may have been ignorant--isolating himself until now had clearly been a mistake--but Ben knew he couldn’t just give chase like a fucking _animal_.

Not for the first time, he felt his chest twist in self-loathing. Why did he have to be so pathetic?

The omega had looked little and undaunting, waterlogged from the weather. He shouldn’t have felt so intimidated by her. The prospect of _talking_ to her shouldn’t have sent a prickle of panic down his spine.

He glared down at his shoes, refusing to acknowledge the tugging sensation tucked between his ribs, leading back to her. Instinct thrummed under his skin, telling him to start running. Logic won in the end.

Ben would only disappoint her, after all.

 

* * *

 

He was an _idiot_.

After their eyes had locked, Rey was convinced he’d come looking for her in an instant. Every time someone walked through the front entrance her head had shot up with expectation, only for her to be let down again.

Her entire lunch hour had been spent in the bathroom, fingers desperately thrusting in search of relief. It had been a waste of time, ultimately. She wouldn’t feel satisfied with just her skinny digits.

Exhausted, about ready to erupt with tears, she fidgeted as she waited for the bus ride home.  
What kind of alpha was he, to leave her so achingly empty like this?

Scowling, she stomped on the bus when it arrived--only to be hit by a sudden wave of an alpha’s scent once more.

Rey forced herself to slow down, to properly pay for her ride, but she could feel his brown eyes fixed on her.

Irrationally, she was infuriated.

There were fewer passengers now than there had been in the morning and the seat next to him was vacant. With her lips pressed in a thin line, Rey held his burning, curious gaze as she approached, legs wobbling only once she was within an arm’s reach of him.

She flopped into the open seat, the alpha nearly gaping. Rey didn’t bother with formalities.

“What. The. _Hell.”_

He frowned. “What did I do?”

Dear _lord_. His voice was deep and smooth and made her want to slide into his lap, then and there. Her hips shifted as she tried to get comfortable and his nostrils flared. She was going to leave a wet spot on the seat.

“You didn’t come back!” she seethed under breath.

He exhaled slowly through his mouth. “Was I supposed to?”

Rey blinked stupidly back at him. It wasn’t exactly a written law. He wasn’t technically obligated to mate with her, regardless of the fact that he was the one to trigger her heat. Rey had never met an alpha that wasn’t interested in easy sex.

It occurred to her that she might have to suffer without release.

“Yes,” she whispered, furious with herself when her eyes started to sting. “I--I’ve been _waiting_. All day.”

“All day,” he repeated, awed. “For me?”

“Yes,” she whimpered.

Bewilderment and deep, delicious _want_ bloomed on his pale face. “Oh.”

Rey didn’t care how pitiful it made her. She parted her legs just enough so that her thigh touched his.

_“Please.”_

He swallowed, glancing out the window. “What’s your name?”

 

* * *

 

Her name came out as a breathy moan.

“Rey.”

Ben felt sick to his stomach from nerves and it was absolutely no help when her head slowly drifted towards his shoulder, her little hand grazing along his forearm to slip around his wrist. He should have been embarrassed by the way his pulse fluttered wildly--there was no doubt she could feel it under her fingertips--but he was too preoccupied with where she was dragging his hand.

Rey curled his fingers over the inseam of her jeans, thighs opening further as she pushed his palm up.

While Ben was uncertain about whether or not he should have given chase, he was pretty damn sure he shouldn’t finger her in the middle of a public bus. Still, he didn’t have the forethought to stop her, and she brushed his fingers along the juncture of her thighs.

 _Fuck_.

That tantalizing, heady moisture was seeping through her jeans.

He had never been so hard in his life. Already, his knot was swelling to the point of pain against his pants.

Ben licked his lips, feeling bold. Her breath hitched as he shifted his backpack from his lap, exposing his prominent bulge. His cock twitched at the soft sound and when she leaned forward to whisper in his ear, her voice came out as a plea.

“Come home with me.”

He could hardly refuse.

Ben nudged at the crown of her head with his nose, gulping in her teasing sweetness. He wanted to mouth at the sensitive skin at her throat, to feel her pulse against his lapping tongue, but he mastered the impulse, remembering where he was.

“Yes,” he mumbled as he nuzzled her silky, auburn hair. _“Yes.”_

He was lightheaded as she dragged him out into the street, the sky a dull violet as the sun dropped somewhere behind the cloud cover. With each of her hurried steps, the scent of her arousal wafted up to him, gradually driving him mad. But her hand slid into his and it gave him something to focus on while they rushed down the sidewalk.

Her building was tucked away on a side street, shielded from the loudest sounds of traffic, but she didn’t give him long to admire the quaint brownstone, leading him up the stairs two at a time.

Uncertainty crept up to his cheeks as she pushed him through her door, pink spreading to his ears. For all his roaring instincts, Ben hardly knew what to do with the little, omega woman that had dragged him home with her. His fingers itched to touch her but he was woefully underprepared.

How was he supposed to admit to her that he was utterly and pathetically inexperienced? An alpha was supposed to know how to care for a needy omega--already, he was failing her.

Rey looked up at him as if disappointed that he hadn’t thrown her against a wall to rut into the softness between her legs the moment her door shut.

“What’s wrong, alpha?”

He had to look away in shame. _Some alpha._ “It’s Ben.”

She hummed, invading his space to graze her cheeks across his chest. She was marking him, he realized, stilling beneath her. When she shifted closer, he could feel the slight give of her stomach pressed around his cock.

“Uh--”

Rey guided his hands to her narrow waist. _“Please,_ Ben.”

He forced the words through his teeth and they came out as a rushed jumble of syllables.

“Don’t laugh but...I’venevermetanomegabeforeandI’mavirgin.”

A small smile brightened her face, her amusement obvious. “What?”

He cleared his throat awkwardly. “I’ve never met an omega before. I have no idea what I’m doing.”

 

* * *

 

Rey wanted to ask if he had been living in the middle of the woods all his life, for him to have never met an omega before. What had happened to him when he presented and his hormones sent him into his first rut? Instead, she pulled him to her bedroom. Properly mollified, he stared as she popped open the button of her jeans, then yanked her sweater up and over her head.

She could still feel his eyes on her as she turned around, bending over to shuck her pants legs, and when she climbed naked onto the bed. Rey positioned herself slowly, leaning forward on her arms and her backside jutting upwards enticingly. The air was cool against the heat of her cunt and his fixed stare forced her tailbone even higher, her slick walls contracting around _nothing_.

She didn’t hear him when he moved but suddenly her legs were being stretched further apart by a pair of large, hot hands.

“I’m going to taste you,” he told her with a formal tone.

Rey didn’t have time to tease him for it, moaning as something broad and warm and wet sank into her center without preamble. His tongue twisted within her, his answering groan reverberating through her in a way that made her toes curl.

He was greedy and indelicate, rumbling deep in his chest as he slurped and sucked on her flesh. Rey whined, rubbing into his face as he gave long, lingering licks that had her dripping with desire. With a slow swipe, Ben ran his tongue up, up, up, past her glistening pussy to faintly skim over the tight pucker of her ass.

She jolted with surprise. “Ben--”

He prodded at her with the point of his tongue, slipping into her velvety channel.

“Oh!”

Ben grunted, gripping her hips with enough force to leave bruises. He was clearly determined, and each hot lick had Rey trembling. She knew that her scent was particularly strong there, that it was perfectly natural for him to taste.

Most alphas thought the act was too...old-fashioned. It was what animals did to prepare a mate, they had evolved past the compulsion. Yet, Ben was voracious as he thrust his tongue past the tight ring of muscles, soft, indecent noises catching in the back of his throat.

“I’m not most alphas,” he mumbled, gently laving.

Rey hadn’t realized she’d been rambling aloud.

What she did know was that she was so, achingly empty. She needed something thick and hard to clench around, badly enough for her eyes to prickle with tears.

“More--” she keened, his tongue plunging through her furrowed flesh, _“--yes,_ oh, I need more. Please, please, Ben, give me more.”

Now was not the time for him to be hesitant. Rey nearly cried out in frustration as he lifted his mouth away.

“You mean…?”

“Yes!” she snarled back. “I mean your cock, inside me _now_. I need you to fuck me so hard that I can’t walk for days. I need to come around you--oh, god-- _Ben,_  I need to come, please make me come--”

Rey whimpered as he firmly pressed his hips to her backside, his hardness still tucked into his pants. He felt big enough to deliver on what she wanted, big enough to nearly split her in two.

A long finger traced her slippery, lower lips before entering her to the knuckle.

His voice came out as a pained growl. “I’m not sure you’re ready for me yet, little girl.”

She couldn’t care how desperate it made her; Rey shouted in agony. “I don’t _care!”_

Oversensitized, the mere sound of his zipper dragging open had her squirming. How could he be so calm? Rey was ready to start tearing her hair out.

“Alright,” he soothed her, a warm palm smoothing along the curve of her spine. “I’ll make it better. I’ll fill you up nice and good, until you can’t move a muscle without feeling me inside you, okay?”

She sniffled, sheets rustling beneath her as she nodded her head.

Rey yelped as the bed disappeared, Ben picking her up to toss her onto her back further up the mattress.

 

* * *

 

Ben swallowed.

The little omega was splayed on the bed like a feast, her pretty cheeks flushed with arousal. He chewed on his bottom lip, thankful that her gaze was drawn away from his face so she couldn’t see his embarrassment. An odd sense of satisfaction spread through his chest when he followed her eyes down to his dick. If she was trying to hide how impressed she was, she was doing a poor job of it.

Okay. He could do this. He could give Rey what she needed.

Fascinated, he watched as a shiny dribble of her slick soaked into the sheet under her bottom.

Ben tried to imagine how she would feel, firmly wrapped around him, so warm and wet that he was likely to lose his mind. Belatedly, he realized there was a good chance he was going to embarrass himself further. He’d already embarrassed himself by having to admit he didn’t know what he was doing.

What if she didn’t come?

He’d have to bury his head in shame. What the fuck kind of alpha couldn’t get an omega to come? He’d probably end up knotting her and they would be stuck like that in uncomfortable silence until he finished--

“Ben,” she moaned, canting her hips sporadically, “stop overthinking it and _fuck me already.”_

He exhaled. Okay. Right. He could do this. He had to be able to do this. It was just nature, wasn’t it?

Ben curled a fist around himself, thumb swiping away a round drop of pre-cum from his sensitive slit, his abdominals twitching with anticipation. He admired her for a moment more, slowly pumping his hand as his eyes circled the dusky rosebuds of her pebbled nipples and the slight curve of her flat belly. A small hand covered his knuckles, guiding him towards the cleft between her long, limber legs.

With amazement, Ben watched the rounded, nearly purpling head of his cock press between her lower lips, the delicious sensation of being enveloped by such an unbearably wet heat driving him forward. He breached her in slow increments, working himself into her with careful nudges until there was nothing but _her_ surrounding him, his hips meeting hers with a soft thump.

Ben hadn’t realized she had been holding her breath until a strained mewl burst from between clenched teeth.

“Oh my god, Ben, you’re so _big,”_ Rey gasped, rolling her hips forward. “It’s almost _too_ big--ah!--it feels like I’m being torn apart by your cock but it’s so, so, good.”

He glided out of her, glancing down to stare at his length as her swollen, pink pussy swallowed the entirety of him once more. The squeeze of her little body was enough to make him lightheaded and Ben had to lean onto his elbow to keep himself from crushing her beneath him.

“I’ll put you back together again,” he promised, heaving into her with enough force to create a slapping noise.

Her head rolled back as a sob ripped from her throat. “Yes!”

His chest burned with a need to _move_ at the sound of her approval. Ben retreated until just the tip of him remained within her before slamming back home. She cried out again, slender fingers clawing at her sheets, her back arching off the bed to bring her chest to his face. He grazed his cheeks against her small breasts, nuzzling her soft mounds before drawing one entirely into his mouth.

She squealed, jerking when his next thrust filled her at a new angle, roughly suckling, his tongue swiping at the tight point of her nipple.

“Yes!” she repeated, tears glistening in the creases of her shut eyes. “Oh, _yes!_ Just like that, please--oh god, please--I need to come. Make me come, Ben, I need to come around your cock--”

He growled around the softness of her breast, moving through her with heavy rocks that sent her headboard careening into the wall with steady knocks. Every part of her was trembling, her body receptive and _ready_. Blindly, he gripped one of her thighs to hook it over his hip, and she wrapped her other leg around him to link her ankles together against his back. Over the obscene sound of his ballsack hitting her backside, Rey whimpered and writhed.

“Knot me,” she panted, mouth open and eyes still closed. “Knot me, knot me, knot me--”

Ben released he breast with an audible pop. It was flushed red from his attention and pride flared in his chest at the sight of it.

“Look me in the eyes when you say that,” he hissed, nipping over the sharp edge of her collarbone and kissing her scent gland lazily, teeth gently scraping the delicate layers of skin protecting it. Her pheromones were fluctuating wildly, telling him: _now, now, now, knot me now and fill me with your seed._

Rey yanked at his hair, nails rasping at his scalp, forcing him to meet her frantic, hazel gaze. Her patience, it seemed, had run thin.

“Knot me, Ben,” she seethed, brushing her lips along his jaw.

A shiver ran along the length of his spine, a groan tumbling past his mouth as he felt himself swell, as if by her command. She echoed the sound with a satisfied gasp of her own, thighs falling flat onto the bed to stretch wide enough for him. Her hand slipped between their bodies, fingers furiously stroking at the hard rise of her clit as his knot filled out completely, his muscles quaking as he worked himself into her.

With a sharp wail, Rey snapped, her eyes rolling back as her limbs went taut, her cunt fluttering around his considerable girth with a rush of moisture. Ben snapped his hips, the hot slick of her release easing his way.

He roared as he locked into place and her clenching walls were too much--his balls tightened nearly to the point of pain before he fractured.

 

* * *

 

Ben had practically collapsed on top of her, his weight strangely comforting as she shuddered around his still-hard cock, his thick knot preventing his come from spilling. Rey had rearranged them with wobbling motions, rolling him onto his back to rest on top, him buried deep within her and still pulsing with hot come.

She hummed, drawing idle patterns on his broad chest, fully sated and more than happy to stay put. Ben was warm and sturdy under her, his round, brown eyes half-lidded in exhaustion. If he truly had never been with an omega before, this period of connectedness and utter contentedness could extend past the usual ten minutes. She was hardly complaining.

“That,” he finally whispered, “was nice.”

Rey grinned, shifting to prop herself up. His breath caught in his throat, eyes bulging with surprise and she laughed as he helplessly jolted with the next wave of liquid warmth. It was all too easy to tease him.

“Only nice?”

Damn him, and his stunning, _mesmerizing_ eyes. They fixed her in place, dark and thoughtful.

“No,” he murmured. “It was perfect.”

She should have giggled and preened at his seriousness. Instead, something unnamed and dangerous spread in her chest, her smile softening as she pecked his cheeks affectionately.

“Good, because I’m nowhere near to being done with you yet.”

He rumbled back wordlessly, arms folding around her, much too pleased to hear it.

 

 

 


	2. forth: i

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Evelyn, you're amazing AS USUAL! Thanks for being an awesome beta <3

He felt the full-body shiver as it buzzed through her. Rey muffled her pleased outcry in the warmth of his open mouth, her hips jolting upward to meet his deep thrust as she pulled his swollen bottom lip past her teeth.

 

“Oh, Ben,” she whimpered, eyes rolling back.  _ “Please.” _

 

He growled back at her. She was so  _ close,  _ and the sporadic squeeze of her cunt around him was nearly enough to tip him over the edge. Stubbornly, he pushed his body up, gripping the wooden headboard so tightly his knuckles popped, then dug into the mattress with his knees for better leverage. When he snapped his hips into her again, Rey shrieked.

 

“Fuck,” he seethed, grinding his pelvis into the cradle of her hips with pointed jerks.  _ “Fuck!  _ I’m going to fill you up so well.”

 

“Yes, yes-- _ ah!  _ Oh God, I need more--”

 

Ben cupped the backs of her knees and pushed them forward, her thighs bracketing her smooth belly and allowing him deeper. He leaned over to tongue at the divot of her throat, lapping up a glistening trickle of sweat as he blindly stroked her clit with the pad of his thumb. Rey sobbed his name as the knot at the base of his cock swelled and he fucked the thick band of flesh into her, a rush of her wet heat easing his way.

 

She clenched around him, her nails clinging to his shoulders as she was helplessly swept away. Ben’s vision became spotted, a shout building in his chest as liquid fire licked up his spine and his balls pulled tight. He felt as if his lungs had collapsed, a broken gasp bursting past his clamped teeth as he spilled into her.

 

Rey wiggled with a short whine, huffing under his considerable weight as he continued to come in long spurts, his knot pressing up against her walls to keep his come where it was supposed to be. Inside her. Making a baby, he hoped.

 

He shifted onto his side and Rey threw a leg over his hip to move closer, their bodies heaving in tandem.

 

“If  _ that _ didn’t get me pregnant, I’m not sure what will,” she snickered, pecking his cheeks and nose and chin with little kisses that tickled.

 

Ben smiled to himself. “I don’t know, I think I might like this  _ trying  _ thing.”

 

Rey laughed, her palm patting the broad plain of his chest. “Daddy isn’t having second thoughts, is he? Seems a little counterintuitive, considering you put a  _ tire swing  _ up yesterday afternoon.”

 

Ben’s face flooded with warmth, a scowl twisting his full lips.

 

“I always wanted a swing as a kid,” he grumbled. Was he not allowed to be excited?

 

She grinned as she craned her neck towards his lips for a kiss and Ben licked into her mouth, rocking his hips to jostle their locked bodies. He loved the hum of her lips as she moaned, the cloying sweetness of her scent sinking into his skin. Soon her scent would ripen, her hormones rising and her middle growing to accommodate the life they created together.

 

Ben stroked her flat stomach at the thought of it expanding.

 

* * *

 

It was the stress, Rey told herself. After deciding to become pregnant, she and Ben realized that their apartment, while perfectly suited for the pair of them, wouldn’t be ideal for a family. She didn’t want to imagine sharing a single bathroom and though the spare room could serve as a nursery, Rey knew she would want to give their firstborn a whole litter of siblings to play with. So, out to the suburbs they moved.

 

It’s just the stress.

 

Telling herself that didn’t prevent tears from gathering as she dumped her third failed pregnancy test in as many months into the bathroom garbage can. 

 

She wasn’t sure what to tell Ben, sitting on the living room couch, his leg jumping up and down as he waited for happy news. Rey wasn’t sure she could stand watching his expression fall with disappointment again.

 

* * *

 

Ben nearly laughed when Rey rolled onto her back and kicked both of her legs into the air at a ninety-degree angle, holding the position as she shifted her hips up. It didn’t fully prevent his come from escaping in thick trickles but the purpose was obvious.

 

“Sweetheart,” he brushed his lips against her forehead, still sticky with perspiration. “What are you doing?”

 

She turned her head away, her face blooming with pink. “I read on a mummy blog that doing this increases chances of conceiving. It allows the sperm easier access to my cervix.” 

 

Ben almost told her that was the point of knotting, to flood her with sperm until it filled every crevice. But she knew that already. Just as they both knew there was something very wrong with this scenario. Here he was, mated to a goddess of an omega, and no matter how many times he fucked her, he wasn’t giving her what she needed. He was failing her so badly she had to resort to strange, gimmicky advice from the internet to accomplish what should be easy in her hyper-fertile state.

 

He didn’t want to admit it, but, “I might be shooting blanks.”

 

“Ben--”

 

“Something isn’t right,” he continued, even though he knew this wasn’t the time or place to face this, while they lay in their bed, his come cooling on her thighs. He couldn’t shake the feeling that he was doing this wrong, somehow.

 

“Sometimes it takes months, even years to conceive--”

 

“For an omega in heat? For a mated pair? It’s almost been a year, we should already  _ have _ our baby.” 

 

Her legs fell against the bedspread. She had nothing to say; it was the truth. And Ben knew how desperately Rey longed to have a family of their own making. Little boys with freckles and oversized ears and little girls with dark curls and sweet, smiley dimples pervaded her dreams.

 

He tugged her into the circle of his arms, ducking his face into the crook of her neck to nose at her scent gland. Ben had to fix this somehow.

 

“I think,” she whispered, “we need to talk to a doctor.”

 

* * *

 

The pleather chair in the OB-GYN office lobby squeaked under her thighs when she shifted. The practitioner specialized in mated pairs and highly reviewed by omegas and alphas alike. She resisted looking at all the happily pregnant women waiting alongside her, some accompanied by their mate and others by small gaggles of children. 

 

How was it fair that they had multiple children when she couldn’t have even  _ one _ ?

 

Ben had pleaded to join her for the appointment, but Rey wasn’t sure she would be able to console him when the doctor inevitably announced what prevented her from conceiving. He was still fixated on the assumption that he was impotent but she knew the issue lay with her. 

 

Rey couldn’t handle his grief piling atop her own.

 

A nurse in a pair of pink, floral scrubs emerged from a door in the rear of the waiting room. She swallowed her dread down before following the nurse into a small consultation office. Her eyes stung as she sat in the pleather chair to wait for Doctor Holdo in the still, sanitary silence of her office. 

 

She suddenly wished Ben was there to hold her hand. Rey didn’t shake off the feeling until she was long home, his warm, large body coiled protectively around her, Ben’s low voice rumbling sweet nothings she couldn’t fully process.

 

* * *

 

All Ben knew about Rey’s biological parents was that they left with her from Ukraine on a delivery run to Sussex--a so-called vacation as far as toddler Rey knew--and had returned home childless. She hadn’t remembered her surname, only the town she should have lived in if she had gone back to Ukraine:  _ Jakku.  _ So, she was dubbed Rey Jakkuvych by child services and passed from one foster home to the next.

 

He didn’t know if they were a mated pair or betas, or if Rey had her father’s squared jaw or her mother’s.

 

When Rey walked through the front door after her appointment, she was wearing the same helpless expression she did whenever she spoke about her family. He lurched from the couch to catch her as she swayed, shock steeped into the liquid hazel of her eyes.

 

“It’s me,” she whispered. “It’s my fault we don’t have a baby.”

 

He didn’t want to think about logistics yet. Ben tugged her over to the couch and cradled her in his arms, calmness only reaching him once their breathing synced, her chest rising and falling against his.

 

“I was on suppressants as soon as I presented and lack of nutrition stunted my hormones further. Doctor Holdo said I didn’t have the necessary heat cycles and...and--”

 

A sob burst from her chest.

 

“I was only  _ on  _ suppressants because of Plutt-- _ he  _ wouldn’t feed me--”

 

He swallowed back the question that burned in the back of his throat.  _ What does this mean?  _

 

“This isn’t your fault,” Ben soothed, gently stroking the scent gland at the curve of her neck with his thumb.

 

“It _is_ ,” she wept, clutching him tighter. “I might never be able to conceive.”

 

Ben tried to resist asking, “But it’s possible?”

 

“It’ll be difficult,” Rey evaded.

 

“It could happen, then,” he concluded.

 

She continued, refusing to lift her face away from the span of his chest. “I’ll have to take hormonal supplements. You could be prescribed a rut-booster, and even that may not be enough. Insemination might be our only option, Holdo didn’t sound convinced.”

 

Ben refused to be deterred. “It won’t be easy,” he agreed.

 

“Ben, I’m so sorry that I can’t just give--”

 

“Stop,” he interrupted. “You’ve wanted a family all your life and I  _ promise  _ you, one way or another, we’ll make it happen. Even if that means adopting, or getting ten cats.”

 

She offered a watery laugh. “You’re allergic to cats. Severely.” 

 

He smiled into her hair. It smelled sweetly floral, like honeyed lavender, and eased his tense shoulders.

 

“I’d suffer a runny nose for you, Rey.” He’d suffer just about anything.

 

* * *

 

It had been three months since starting her horse-pill supplements. She didn’t tell Ben that she was taking a test again. In fact, she waited until he was out of the house before opening the three-pack of  _ Omega Check  _ tests. It was relatively early in her treatment and she didn’t think he could handle another failure yet. It broke her to see his hope diminish more with every test she took.

 

Slumped on the toilet, she read the results. Then a second time.

 

Rey blindly reached for her phone from where she left it on the sink counter, thumbing in her password with hands so shaky, it took three tries to succeed. She opened her favorites and called her first contact.

 

“Ben,” she said before he could make any greeting. “Turn around and come home.”

 

“I’m five minutes from work,” he groused.

 

_ “Now,  _ Ben!”

 

He paused at her frantic tone. “I’m getting off the bus. Is everything okay?” 

 

Sensing urgency, he made his own conclusions before she could answer. “I’m getting an Uber, I’ll be home in about twenty minutes. Will you be alright until then?”

 

She shuddered a sigh.

 

“Yes, yes, I’ll be fine. See you soon.”

 

Rey ended the call to rush back to the bathroom. Flustered by the test results displayed on the counter, she snatched an unused test and sat on the toilet.

 

Three pregnancy tests lay perpendicular to each other and in mutual agreement on the kitchen table as Ben turned the key in the deadbolt. Rey had planned to sit calmly at the table but the subtle clicks goaded her to stand, and Ben’s face as he nervously stepped inside had her charging into a leap he wasn’t prepared for.

 

He caught her with a startled grunt and Rey clutched her arms around his neck, her legs twining about his waist. All the announcements she had brainstormed during his return journey left her mind and she leaned into his ear.

 

“Welcome home, Daddy.”

 

He groaned, dumping his briefcase on the floor despite the fact his computer was tucked inside. 

 

“Is my precious omega in the family way?”

 

Rey laughed from deep in her belly as her lips sought his.

 

_ “Yes,  _ you silly fuddy-duddy.” 

 

He hummed into her mouth. “Fuck work,” he uttered, carrying her towards the couch with hurried stomps.

 

* * *

 

It was only nine weeks. Yet there was a definite... _ bubble  _ spanning her lower stomach. Rey had surmised that their original conception date must be off. Ben was less certain that was the case. He’d met pregnant omegas before and granted, Rey was his mate and her scent was naturally stronger to him, but she was much sharper, more potent smelling than he expected.

 

Ben didn’t want to say he was worried. Clearly the child was growing; Rey’s bump attested to that. He just wanted to understand what this early growth spurt meant.

 

She was happy there was a little, cherry-sized (or likely larger) creature that had settled in her womb and had no desire to question her pregnancy. Involving doctors reminded her too much of how difficult conceiving had been and considering her other symptoms, everything was perfectly normal in her book. If by normal she meant bending to the will of their cherry-baby--and over a porcelain bowl--for most of the day or backaches that confined her to the bed for hours at a time.

 

His leg bounced against the tiled floor of the OB-GYN lobby. Rey pointedly rolled her eyes at him, grasping his wrist to rest the palm of his hand to the small swell as if to remind him  _ we’re fine.  _

 

_ We’re right here. _

 

Ben braced himself as the nurse fumbled to call  _ Jakkuvych  _ into the waiting room. Why did it feel like he was walking towards a death sentence as they were led into Holdo’s office? He wanted this baby as much as Rey did.

 

Doctor Holdo was calm and wore an easy smile as she entered the office, commenting offhandedly, “Well, Miss Rey, it seems you’re further along than we originally believed. How have you been feeling?”

 

This question was followed by a litany of others. “Have you been experiencing nausea?” Emphatically  _ yes.  _ “Any stiffness in your back? Are your breasts sore? Do you sleep during the day?”  _ Yes, yes, definitely yes. _

 

Ben laced his fingers through hers during the PAP smear and continued to clench her hand as Holdo prepared the ultrasound. Rey hissed as blue gel was spread across her belly with the probe, turning her head to the screen with a smile she bit her lips through.

 

Slowly, the image cleared and Holdo murmured an  _ ah  _ to herself. “That certainly explains the rapid growth. There are three heartbeats.”

 

Ben staggered.  _ Three  _ heartbeats? 

 

Rey clapped her hand over her mouth. “Oh my god.”

 

“Why does our baby have three hearts?” 

 

Holdo remained perfectly patient with his question but Rey shook her head and laughed. “Seriously, Ben?”

 

“It doesn’t,” Holdo replied. “Each fetus has their own heart.”

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think! Feedback is always appreciated. :)


	3. back: ii

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a reminder, this fic alternates between past and future with every chapter. Now we're in the past again!

He was so peaceful in his sleep that Rey didn’t bother waking him. It was easier to tell him to see himself out on a post-it note than in person anyway. Ben was nice, there was no denying it, and he was rather well-endowed to boot, but after three days spent twisted in her sheets with him, her heat was fading. It was time to get back to life.

 

She took a quick shower to wash away the sweat of sleeping next to a veritable body heater, made a pot of coffee (she was even kind enough to leave some for him), and rushed out the door to catch the 7:45 bus into town. He would have his own bus to catch and his own life to return to. When she got home, she would strip the bed and air out the room and all would be as it should.

 

Rey felt somewhat guilty through her shift at the library; Ben was more gentle than most alphas and hadn’t been bothered by how she tended to boss men around in bed, but by lunch she remembered that she wasn’t looking for a relationship and that clean breaks were easiest.

 

Or so she thought.

 

To her surprise, as she scrambled to get her keys to her apartment, laden with grocery bags, there was a tell-tale click of the deadbolt being unlocked and the door swung open, an overgrown  _ puppy  _ of an alpha on the other side.

 

“Ben!” She started, too flustered at his frankly unwanted presence to stop him from taking her bags.

 

Rey stood gobsmacked when he punctuated his casual  _ hey,  _ with a kiss then took the groceries into kitchen to start putting them away. The absolute gall!

 

“I had another day of vacation saved up but you forgot to leave your cell number, otherwise I would have gone shopping for you,” he said, setting  _ her  _ almond milk into  _ her  _ refrigerator while she kicked off her flats and hung her coat in the closet. “I washed the sheets though and there were some dishes in the sink--”

 

What the fuck did he think he was doing? This was entirely too awkward and would have been avoided if she had just woke him up that morning.

 

“Wait, wait, wait,” she interrupted. “Didn’t you get my note?”

 

* * *

 

Ben paused, frowning. “What note?”

He had felt pretty damned pleased with himself until that moment. Ben knew in that instant, regardless of the contents of her supposed note, that he probably shouldn’t have made himself so at home in her apartment. It had been a long time since he had been able to wake naturally after a full night's sleep and after several days of fucking Rey and not much else he’d felt...comfortable in his own skin.

 

Ben might not have seen her note but he  _ had  _ seen the half pot of coffee waiting for him when he emerged from her bedroom and the sight of it had warmed something in his chest. That same something was icing over with panic now. All he had done was recognize a few things that needed cleaning after Rey’s all-consuming heat.

 

He thought he was helping.

 

It was Ben’s come that had stained her sheets so it seemed only right he be the one to wash them. The prospect of dirtying them again with her had been enough for him to take himself in hand, though nothing could possibly compare to the pleasure of being with her now that he  _ knew  _ how it was supposed to be. 

 

In an odd way, it had felt right to do something for her.

 

He was so caught up in his spiraling thoughts that he didn’t realize she had left the room until she was returning with a yellow post-it tacked to her thumb.

 

_ “This  _ note,” she huffed, handing it to him.

 

**Ben-- Thanks for everything.**

**Don’t forget to lock the front door!**

  
  


“Thanks for everything,” he read with a flat tone. It occurred to him that “It wasn’t an accident that you didn’t leave your phone number.”

 

She bit her lower lip. “No, it wasn’t.”

 

He looked back down at her impersonal, little note. 

 

“You couldn’t have woke me up, or something? I mean...” he glanced back up to find her bracing herself. As if he would lash out. “...you should have told me how it was going to be before we slept together.”

 

Her cheeks brightened with defensive anger and she propped her hands on her hips as she stared him down. “Maybe I should have. Then I would have to deal with a  _ big, strong alpha  _ who thinks they need to be my nanny just because they’ve had their prick inside me!”

 

Her eyes darted around the apartment. “For fuck’s sake, did you dust, too?”

 

What was  _ wrong  _ with her? If she had wanted him gone, she could have asked. It would have stung a bit but it wasn’t as if he would have refused. Fury and hurt--dammit all, he had really liked her--sank into his chest like a glowing, orange coal.

 

“I don’t know what your problem is! I thought the last few days had gone pretty well--”

 

“Of course you did,” she interrupted with a snort. “That’s just like an alpha-male to think a good fuck is a basis to start a relationship.”

 

Ben’s jaw snapped shut, his teeth clenching at her accusation. 

 

Not for the first time, he missed the solidarity and understanding of private alpha education. His mother may have shipped him off to get her troubling, misbehaving son out of the public eye but he’d still found his own belonging at prep school, then at university. He missed Starkiller University’s woodsy, clean campus and wizened alpha elders, and not have to wonder why someone did or didn’t like him. Rey could say all she wanted about alphas, at least they were  _ honest.  _

 

Headmaster Snoke had warned him that the outside world was different, that the rarity of alphas had changed society for the worst. Ben just wished Snoke had had the forethought to better explain the behavior of omegas. Never had he ever felt so out of depth before.

 

“I don’t have to put up with this,” he decided.

 

“We’re on the same page, then,” she said, holding open the door.

 

He left, spitefully hoping that she forgot to check the washer for her comforter and it rotted in the machine.

 

* * *

 

Rey deflated behind the closed door. She could still hear the heavy stomps of Ben’s strides as he fled the apartment, hopefully for good. She didn’t know what she would do if he reappeared without invitation.

 

She knew she had been harsh; besides spreading the overwhelming scent of his pheromones around the apartment, he hadn’t done anything wrong. It was sweet, even, that he had cleaned her sheets. In the past, she had been lucky if the alpha in question so much as tossed her a tissue to clean herself with before they were tucking themselves back into their pants and making a break for it. Which was fine, ultimately, if a little lonely.

 

It was fortunate that Rey was more than used to loneliness.

 

If she hadn’t made her point clear with Ben, she would only have grown complacent. Even if it was kind of nice to have someone to help put the groceries away, or to wash the coffee pot for her, or to greet her with a kiss. She couldn’t let him in only to have him leave her, as he inevitably would. 

 

Besides, if he was telling the truth, once he met another omega he would realize her dainty curves and small bosom paled in comparison. Who would want such a scrawny, little omega like her when there was a whole city of better options? In a few months, he would thank her for allowing him to find someone who could properly fill those large hands of his.

 

This was for the best.

 

It had to be.

 

So why did she regret it already?

 

Rey shook out her hair, sighing as she opened the dryer to pull out the fitted sheet. She pulled the warm cotton around her shoulders and took a deep breath. Somehow, it still smelled faintly like him.

 

* * *

 

Ben sat on the front stoop of Rey’s building for a long time, feeling foolish. He wondered if...if his performance had been below par or if  _ this  _ was simply how it worked between alphas and omegas now. It wasn’t as if he was particularly knowledgeable; everything he knew about how a  _ real _ alpha should act had come from reading his grandfather’s journals but clearly, times had changed. He’d  _ thought  _ he’d done a pretty decent job, considering how vocal Rey had been about giving her praises.

 

Eventually, he stood. Ben could only imagine the mortification he would feel if Rey decided to leave her apartment and discovered him wallowing outside like a kicked dog. Would she yell at him again for overstepping his bounds?

 

Rage swelled in him at the thought. Who was she to act so superior? She was nothing, he told himself,  _ no one.  _ She certainly wasn’t worth the ache that had lodged itself in his throat from the moment she had handed him that stupid post-it.

 

If she wanted nothing more to do with him, that was fine by Ben.

 

* * *

 

Catching the same bus as Ben once had been a coincidence. A second time had been luck. Now she found him standing near the rear door of the bus, long fingers clenched around a metal bar to keep him steady, and she recognized that a third time made a pattern. His scent was just as clean and sharp as she remembered, surrounded by the bitter, chemical stench of other riders’ colognes.

 

Thankfully he wouldn’t trigger another heat so swiftly after the previous but if they were truly on the same schedule and rode the same bus regularly, she would have to plan for it. He wouldn’t be helping her through the unbearable need again; she had seen to that.

 

He realized when she got onto the bus, his muscles tensing and a scowl twisting his plush lips, and Rey fortified herself with a deep breath when he fixed her with a penetrating glare. She told herself that his anger was justified, but was it?

 

Rey let her hair drop from where it was curled behind her ear, shielding herself from his dark eyes. 

 

So she hadn’t wanted more than a virile alpha to satisfy her heat, how did that make her the villain here? Just because she had wanted a good, rough fuck didn’t mean she was obligated to offer him more. He wasn’t her mate and it hadn’t been on the table as she had dragged him through the rain to her home.

 

Typical alpha. He thought that because she’d been covered with his scent that she belonged to him, that he had a right to claim her. That may have been true in the past but with the decline in alpha and omega births, his designation no longer possessed control of how the world spun. Ben was just going to have to get used to the idea that being an alpha didn’t carry the weight it might have a hundred, or even fifty years ago.

 

That was hardly  _ her  _ problem.

 

She straightened her back, tossing her loose hair back over her shoulder with the shake of her head. She hoped he could pick up her scent with the same ease she could smell his, and that it drove him just as crazy. Rey had been taking this route to the library for three years, he was the new-comer here. If he had an issue with seeing her so frequently, it was up to him to change not her.

 

When the bus approached her stop, she returned his dangerous glare with one of her own.

 

* * *

 

It was more difficult to get over Rey than it should have been, seeing her nearly every day on his commutes to and from work made matters impossible. He could smell her the instant she boarded, softer than the first time but still sweet and tantalizing. It made Ben want to gather her in his arms and breathe in her luscious scent until his nostrils burned with it and he wouldn’t be able to forget. He knew these thoughts were less than helpful but he still wanted her, even after the sting of her rejection.

 

Ben blamed it on his stupid alpha instincts. Why else would he think about all the ways the world could hurt her and that it was his duty to stand between her and harm? Logically, he should hate her. He had  _ tried  _ to hate her. But then he would see her looking just as small and fragile, damp from the rain like that first day, and it would break him all over again.

 

He could only imagine the ridicule she would dish out if she knew how he felt and had taken to glaring when he saw her. It only made the situation more painful when she scowled back, her disdain for him achingly obvious. Rey looked like the sight of him made her physically ill. Perhaps it did.

 

Still, his instincts roared that something was wrong with this situation. They were supposed to be together and they were going against nature itself by remaining apart.

 

She was cruel, he thought. She didn’t deserve all he had to offer. Knowing this changed nothing.

 

* * *

 

Rey had a stubborn streak in her for an omega. She was but a humble librarian, why should she have to change her daily routine for some asshole alpha? She should have bowed down when realizing he had every intention of riding the same bus as her on a daily basis. In the end, she was the only one that would suffer for it.

 

It had only been two months since that first heat and now she felt that tell-tale tingle of pressure in her womb once more. She refused to look in his direction; Ben’s scent was spicier today, more tempting than she could bear, and she knew he could smell the shift of pheromones in her. 

 

That was perhaps the most mortifying part of this, he would know that he had triggered her heat again. He would know and he would do absolutely nothing about it, and she would be forced to writhe through it, never quite satisfied.

 

She had at least had the sense to prepare to an extent, back in her apartment a shiny new vibrator waited. The research she had done claimed it could help any omega through the pains of a lonely heat but when she breathed in deep and could taste  _ Ben  _ at the back of her throat she knew nothing could possibly compare. The thought brought tears to her eyes.

 

A small voice in her head whispered,  _ he might fuck you if you ask nicely. Let that big, strong alpha take care of you. You already know how well he can fill you. _

 

She shook her head, knowing better than to listen to it. She could manage on her own, surely. It wouldn’t be the first time she’d have to. 

 

She didn’t need Ben to take care of her. She  _ didn’t. _

 

Rey couldn’t muster a glare to send his way as she rushed down the bus steps. How pathetic.

 

She spent the first fifteen minutes of her shift in the bathroom weeping, blaming her fluctuating hormones all the while.

 

* * *

 

Ben hadn’t thought too much about the consequences of spending time around an omega on a regular basis. To his fault, he hadn’t  _ needed  _ to. He wished he didn’t care, that his chest didn’t hurt at the thought of her spending a heat on her own. He pretended the ache was from holding his breath, from his muscles pulling taut with restraint.

 

Her gaze had been watery as she stumbled from the bus and that alone was nearly enough to wrench him from his seat so he could tumble after her. Then he reminded himself of that goddamned post-it note and righteous anger flared in his gut. She likely wouldn’t accept his help even if he offered it and Ben refused to put himself in a position to be rejected by her a second time.

 

Suppose she  _ did  _ say yes, it would be her hormones talking and his welcome would run out just as quickly and he would be back where he started.

 

No matter how much he wanted to go rushing after her, he couldn’t. 

 

It felt like defeat, no matter what he did.

 

On the ride home, Rey was in agony. Her eyes were still rimmed with red, her little chest rising and falling with pained, shallow pants. It took every ounce of his self-control to let her sit alone in the front row, then to hurry off the bus at her stop.

 

Frustration boiled in him, anger searing hotter and hotter the further away he got from her. This was  _ wrong!  _ He clenched and unclenched his fists, only just managing to not throw them through the bus window next to him in a fit of fury. 

 

He paced the entryway to his apartment for a solid five minutes before rushing back out his front door. The next bus wouldn’t be for another fifteen minutes and he couldn’t stand to wait, not when he knew she was alone, trembling around her small fingers as she sought a weak completion. Ben wasn’t even sure why he felt so furious, though he knew his anger wasn’t for the helpless omega, waiting for him in her dinky apartment.

 

He broke into a frantic run, not caring how ridiculous he must have looked rushing down the sidewalk, following bus stops back to her.  _ Move, move, movemovemove!  _ Ben couldn’t sprint fast enough, not to match the voice screaming in his head.

 

He was angry with himself, he realized, his blood pumping wildly. He should have been able to work this out with Rey before another heat struck her. Ben had failed her, even if the logical side of him knew there was nothing he could have said to change how she felt. He was supposed to take care of his omega and he hadn’t. What kind of alpha did that make him?

 

Ben was light-headed and gulping for air by the time he reached her building, and taking the stairs two at a time only made him dizzier but now he had her cloying scent scorching his dry throat. It was tainted with distress and desperation and that pushed him the final steps to her door.

 

* * *

 

Rey startled at the pounding on her door. She didn’t have to answer it to know who was on the other side.

 

In a daze, her buzzing vibrator held inside her by clenched thighs, she fumbled her way through her bedroom and living area. This was stupid, stupid, stupid, and her body seemed to agree with her, moving too slowly and with little grace. She had to slump against the wall next to the door for support as she struggled with the lock, she was so far gone. Rey couldn’t recall a heat ever being so intense before.

 

“Ben,” she sobbed as he burst into her apartment,  _ “Ben.” _

 

He kicked the door shut behind him, collapsing with her as he gasped, his thick arms curling around her middle as he mouthed at her scent gland. 

 

A moment of panic pierced through the haze of heat, her muscles tensing with anticipation for his teeth to sink into her skin to make a permanent mark that would tie them together forever. If he sensed her alarm, he didn’t mention it, the flat of his tongue running over the sloped junction of her neck and shoulder. It soothed her more than she was prepared to admit.

 

“I’m here, Rey,” he croaked back, “I’ve got you.”

 

“I can’t--it hurts so much--”

 

She opened her legs for him, the vividly pink vibrator slipping free of her with a wet plop and she cried out at the emptiness she felt, ready to claw at her own skin to shed the unbearable heat that surrounded her entire body.

 

“What  _ is  _ that?” he snarled, rearing away from her with his nose wrinkled in disgust. 

 

He watched as her slick spilled from her, mixed with a creamy, thick lube. It had claimed on the bottle that it had the same soothing effect as an alpha’s come and Rey had hoped it would get her through this heat but it wasn’t hot like it was supposed to be and it smelled all wrong.

 

“You thought this plasticky, fake come would be better than what I can give you?” Ben seethed.

 

Her back arched against the worn carpet, a wail catching in her throat. He sounded insulted but all she knew was how badly she needed to be filled by him and that his knot would stretch her perfectly.

 

“Please... _ please,”  _ she wept listlessly.

 

A growl rumbled in his broad chest. “I’m not fucking you until you’re all I smell.”

 

She reached for him with blind waves of her arm, shaking her head. “No, please, Ben--”

 

Rey anticipated being sent to the bathroom to clean herself and the thought of wiping a washcloth along her throbbing, too-sensitive cunt brought fresh tears to her eyes, even though she knew she deserved the punishment. She had pushed away her alpha, this was  _ her  _ fault and Ben had come for her anyway.

 

She shouted when he covered her dripping sex with his open mouth. It was too much; her hips jolted off the floor as he curled his tongue into her to gather the lube and swallow it down. He poked and prodded and lapped at her and she could do nothing but shiver as she clutched his dark locks, not sure if she wanted to push him away or pull him closer.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will take us to the happy (?) future. You guys should know me well enough by now...I don't like making it easy for them. :)
> 
> Feedback is appreciated...I'd love to hear what you guys think! Thanks for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written a/b/o before so I hope I did an okay job...lmao I never thought I'd write this trope but here we are. The entire fic was loosely inspired by wolf mating...hence the butt licking.
> 
> Let me know what you think about this or HOW EXCITING IT IS FOR TLJ TO BE A WEEK AWAY HOLY HELL!! My body isn't ready.


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